It is with deep sorrow that I write of this revelation.
Does it sound ridiculous? That I would be so presumptuous to think that this is a surprise? That I could be immune to the judgment that everyone, no matter whether they are widely loved or relatively unknown, is subjected to?
I guess it might be. But still, it is a creeping feeling that managed to slip through the cracks. These are cracks that I thought had sealed; this is a feeling that, while ever present at a nagging level, I hadn’t felt surge into every fiber of my body for a long time.
Some think I’m nothing; I don’t want to be among those included.
That’s all I have to say. The rest of the words won’t come to me. They’re locked away somewhere, with everything else I’ve refused to face.